Paula Abdul and Pole Dancers – Soft Launch of Newest AO – Empie Park

Date: 11/29/2018

QIC: Seahorse

# of Pax: 9 (inclusive of YHC)

Pax: Blade, Dixie Chick, Flight Nurse, Hahvahd, Morpheus, Mr. T, Snickers, Tom Sawyer and YHC

YHC was humbled and pleasantly surprised when 8 HIM didn’t let the mid-20’s wind chill keep them from joining YHC for the Soft Launch of F3 Cape Fear’s newest AO!

How did the vision for this AO occur? Well, I’m glad you asked.  YHC read where our fearless former Nantan, LETC, was starting a Bible Study up; Thursday’s, off Oleander Drive.  I don’t post many Thursday’s, as Battleship is a bit of a haul and dedicated run days make me gag.  Plus, digging deeper into the Sky Q’s Word is always on the To-Do list. How do I make myself workout on Thursday’s, get involved in the Bible Study without being a Full Starsky, and Give It Away all at the same time – you got it – Start a fresh AO, right around the corner from the Bible Study location!  Personal preferences; a desire to get better; a desire to help others get better – Sound familiar?  This is how ‘Merica came to be; how F3 was born; and what has brought this latest AO into existence!


As if predestined for an F3 Q to take the center stage, there was a painted white circle, with a  light shining directly down on it. It gets no clearer than this – this is where we begin!

  • Tappy-Taps x20 (There has been some chatter re: offensive exercise names. Some of the culprits do exist within the online F3 exicon, but Cotton “you know what’s” isn’t to be found. For possibly the 1st time in F3 Cape Fear history, the official, all-inclusive version was performed. Not sure but calling out Tap-py-tap 20 times may just be more offensive.)
  • Moroccan Night Club x20
  • Side-Straddle Hop x20
  • Seal Claps x20

Quick breather to give the Pax a super brief run-down on the park’s history (Empie’s donated cash for the city to build a park in their daughter’s honor; city kept acquiring parcels from various land owners until having the 32 acres we now see before us.  Also, the tennis complex that encompasses much of the acreage is named after a true trailblazer:!


Time for some pearls on a string to get acquainted with the park.  Start off with a mosey about 40’ away from the warm-o-rama – Pax were impressed by our first landmark – the park dumpster…now do Plank Jacks x19 -gotta keep these boys guessing!

Next, Pax line up at start of sidewalk and are told we will be completing the next exercise to the closest trash can – this seems to be a ridiculously close finish line until the fun begins – Bear Crawl Merkin – O – Rama, Paula Abdul Style – Pax Bear Crawl 2 steps forward, then Bear Crawl 1 step back, then do 5 Merkins, repeating this until reaching said trash can – which I am certain someone moved about 2 football fields away when I wasn’t looking! 6,000 Merkins and a multitude of Pax grunts later, we reached the finish line.

Lots of chatter about how hot Paula Abdul used to be, as well as other greats like Samantha Fox!  I can still visualize that poster…be right back…

Enough reminiscing – there’s another whole side to the front of this park!  Mosey to the lighted shelter and do 20 single count step-ups and 15 dips OYO on the upscale, wood finish picnic tables.  I think I saw Mr. T putting one in his car before he left.  I pity the fool that tries to say something to him.

Now Mosey to the parking lot for 10 Mike Tyson’s in cadence.  Hey, look, there’s a playground – Let’s Go!  Pax circle up in high plank around the pull-up bar for some Morning Call (1st Pax does 5 Pull-ups while Pax do 1 Merkin for each Pull-up; rotates right until last Pax completes their Pull-ups).

After 45 Merkins, the call ended, so Pax Mosey back to the shelter for 30 single count step-ups and 10 dips before heading across to the nicely illuminated tennis court – Partner up (3 teams of 2 and 1 team of 3) for some Ab-Dora – 100 Freddy Mercury’s; 200 Flutter Kicks; 300 LBC’s, while partner does suicides to end line of each of 3 courts. There was some discussion on what single count meant, but the Pax found a way to ge the work completed.  Tom Sawyer enjoyed the solitude of the moon and stars, while making sure to fully touch the line of each court (bad high school memories, don’t ask- he’s very sensitive) and pondering on how small we really are in this universe.  Deep!  Deep like the mind of Minolta.

Now picture this – almost time to head back but look at that beautiful pole fence – With only 20 reps, 9 men became pole dancers. Previous experience fellas? Pax agreed this would be better on a higher pole.  You gotta start somewhere!

Run back to flags; time for a few minutes of MARY:

  • Makhtar N’Diayes Circle of Pain (All Pax High Plank; 1st Pax calls out a Makhtar N’Diayes, while all Pax follow in Cadence; rotates right until last Pax completes their Makhtar N’Diayes)
  • @Hahvahd complained that planking and Makhtar’ing wasn’t Mary, so he was Freed to Lead the Pax in some Ivy League favorites – Crunchy Frogs x20 – YHC’s frog crunches a lot better on grass than rocky asphalt
  • Time’s Up!


Thank you to all that came out and made the soft launch a success! I hope to see each of you next week…plus more!

Thanks to Snickers for showing up with his magical IPhone 15.  That thing takes the best Name-o-Rama videos around.  You have taken F3 Cape Fear’s social media presence to whole nutha level!  See him for your F3 Leland shirt order – you can avoid shipping with the mass order if you hurry! Home AO or not, the Scorpion logo is sick and will keep all the prudes away, as you’ll look like the leader of a biker gang.   Seriously though Snickers, do you slip the Apple Specialist some Clevelands or Madisons behind the wall for the unreleased model? Ah…thought bubble: Takes me back to my middle school days, scooping latest Jordan’s, 2 days pre-release at Foot Locker then Pimpin’ the whole next day at school. Don’t hate the playa…

Good to see Blade – still sharp as ever!  We used to cross paths much more often – best wishes to the M’s new real estate venture!

I hope all the talk of Paula Abdul and Samantha Fox didn’t offend Dixie Chick.  You are all great artists.  Hopefully you took THE LONG WAY AROUND and are now on TOP OF THE WORLD and will be back at it, READY TO RUN at the next workout.

Flight Nurse, strong work wearing your Ruck to every workout, but did you abandon it  after the Paula Abdul Bearkins?  I may have to do an inspection next time to make sure you don’t have an EPO drip rigged up in there…share the love Lance!

Morpheus graciously appeared, giving us the choice of the Red pill or Blue pill. All the HIM didn’t think twice and chose Red.

Christmas party 12/8/2018 – Wreck-It-Ralph’s – Make your plans now!

Prayers for Snicker’s friend Joey (F3 Dokken in Sandhills) and his family.  Joey had to have emergency surgery to remove a section of his colon and has a colostomy bag and uncertain road ahead.

Prayers for YHC’s youngest daughter – we’re headed to PA next Monday for a 2nd opinion to hopefully get her on the road to full health.

Prayers of thankfulness for those serving to allow us the freedoms we enjoy; for a successful soft launch; for the continued growth of F3, for the good that F3 facilitates in so many sad clowns; for the health to get out and exercise.

I am blown away by the growth that has and continues to occur since my 1st post with F3 a little over 2.5 years ago – May 20, 2016 (thanks to the bond of daycare, thin mints and the persistence of F3’s most photogenic man, Parrot Head).  Just look at our weekly workouts – this could easily be a list for a much larger city like Raleigh or Charlotte:

Day of Week Name Location Start Stop Type
Monday Heavy Metal Monday Hugh MacRae Park 5:30 AM 6:15 AM Kettle Bells
Monday Monster Factory Ogden Park 5:30 AM 6:15 AM Boot-camp
Monday Leland Metal Mania Leland Town Hall Park 5:30 AM 6:15 AM Kettle Bells
Monday Screaming Eagle Veterans Park 5:30 AM 6:15 AM Boot-camp
Tuesday Run Forrest Ruck UNCW 5:30 AM 6:15 AM Run Day
Tuesday Turbo Tuesday Wrightsville Beach UMC 5:30 AM 6:15 AM Run Day
Tuesday Run Brunswick Forest Ruck The Villages at Brunswick Forest 5:30 AM 6:15 AM Run Day
Tuesday The Bridge Snows Cut Bridge 5:30 AM 6:15 AM Run Day
Wed Hump Day Hugh MacRae Hugh MacRae Park 5:30 AM 6:15 AM Boot-camp
Wed Screaming Eagle Veterans Park 5:30 AM 6:15 AM Boot-camp
Wed Stingray Ogden Park 5:30 AM 6:15 AM Boot-camp
Wed Battlefield Halyburton Park 5:30 AM 6:15 AM Boot-camp
Wed Night Tough Ruckers Hugh MacRae Park 6:00 PM 6:45 PM Ruck
Thursday Battleship Ballast Hotel Downton ILM 5:30 AM 6:15 AM Boot-camp
Thursday Affordable Thursday Veterans Park 5:30 AM 6:15 AM Boot-camp
Thursday Cool Runnings Hugh MacRae Park 5:30 AM 6:15 AM Run Day
Thursday Bad Ass Name Coming Soon Empie Park 5:30 AM 6:15 AM Boot-camp
Friday Stingray Ogden Park 5:30 AM 6:15 AM Boot-camp
Friday Screaming Eagle Veterans Park 5:30 AM 6:15 AM Boot-camp
Friday Coastal Surge Hugh McRae Park 5:30 AM 6:15 AM Boot-camp
Friday Leland Leland Town Hall Park 5:30 AM 6:15 AM Boot-camp
Saturday Baywatch Wrightsville Beach Park 7:00 AM 8:00 AM Boot-camp
Saturday Iron Island Carolina Beach Elementary School 7:00 AM 8:00 AM Boot-camp
Sunday Extra Credit Various Vari-ous Vari-ous Vari-ous

Like branches on a tree, we all grow in different directions, yet our roots remain as one.

Always a privilege to lead!

Till the seas free me once more,

Caballo de Mar


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